Life | The Mommyness of Me

Linking up with Mel for Monday Mamlogues...errrr yes its Tuesday, but why not.

Every now and then I wonder what my life would be without Jacques, Josh and Lijie???

The bathroom would be mine.
There would be no toys to step on.
I would never need to dust toy shelves.
Books would always be on the shelf.

Uhhh...no.

I love that when I'm in the bathroom, there are doodles all over the mirror, little stick people playing around my shower doors. Or the random questions that get asked when my toothbrush is doing its rounds in my mouth. (The toothbrush gives you time to think about your answer!)

Toys are exciting and never what they are.
And the narration that goes with them....SO CUTE!!!
And if you do step on them, then it just becomes a part of the game.

If I never had to dust toy shelves I would never find birthday cards, little love notes to each other, a picture of myself when I was 12.

Books around the house are a reminder that we are learning together as a family.
It makes my heart skip a beat when my children love Nesbit, Lewis and Macdonald.
And I get all dreamy when Jacques starts reading our last book in the Wheel Of Time Series.

So yes.
A sad and boring life it would be.
No need for God, or wet wipes, or a desire to grow.
The sink would be empty and so would my heart.
I always think, "ahh but I could have joined a convent."
But I only know this spirituality because of my family,
my Boys,
my Mommyness.

Go on and see how Mel's Mommyness is growing.

Love and Light

Road trip: My Mother Her Mother

When I was a child, about 5; my parents and I had a home in a coastal city.

But fate had it that my Father worked a little more than 3 hours inland.

Deciding to pack me up along with his suitcase, once a week and traverse

to the small town of Ladysmith, was an adventure.

The amazing thing was; I would leave my Mother and arrive at her Mother.

I would leave her Mother and arrive at my Mother.

With my Dad.

A journey of trust.

My Mother Her Mother

The trees disappear

they reappear

i see the light pole

i don’t

here’s a cloud

there’s a cloud

a dam

some cows

a corn field

i’m singing along

my trip there

i cannot wait

i know

i will

see her

she will be

and i will learn

she will do

and i will try

she will grow

and

i will take a leaf

my return

i cannot wait

i know

i will

see her

she will be

and i will learn

she will do

and i will try

she will grow

and

i will take a leaf

>i<

The Secret Ingredient of Pineapple Beer

“The secret things belong to the LORD our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our sons forever, that we may observe all the words of this law."
Deuteronomy 29:29
(Readings for the Liturgy of the Hours at Mount St. Scholastica Lent 2010)

The season of Lent can be described as the Springtime of the Soul; or the chrysalis that wraps the heart, before a beautiful butterfly unfolds its wings.

So just before Ash Wednesday; I took a look at my Life and decided to clean out the clutter. I thought I would open the draws and reach up high on the cupboards throw out the dusty things that just take up place, and that I have absolutely no use for!

Well it turned out, that all the clutter was out in the open; dusted, freshly polished and ready to use, actually in use!
Yes, Lent is a time of self denial, self sacrifice, lamenting; meditation instead of clutter.
It was hard to realise that all of this stuff existed and that it took up precious time and effort that could be directed in something worthwhile. So I took a swallow of my own concoction; of course I had to pinch my nose and throw my head back, but I HAD to!

"...the chrysalis stage in most butterflies is one in which there is little movement. However, some butterfly pupae are capable of moving the abdominal segments to produce sounds to scare away potential predators."
(Wikipedia)

It's the fourth week of the Season, and the above quote is true. With getting rid of all the time consuming BALDERDASH!

OH MY WORD!

Honestly I thought that this would be a quiet time, six weeks of stillness, six weeks of closing my eyes and (breath in breath out).

Every time I close my eyes I hear noise, it does not stop. Every minute that I filled with claptrap, hid potholes in my Soul. I feel the noise, the brokenness, that lies there fermenting like pineapple beer. The stink, the vile flavour that I have to ALSO pinch my nose and swallow.

The noise, the brokenness is not only my pain; it is the pain that I have caused.
It is my pineapples that I have cut and peeled and slowly fermented under my kitchen sink and forced people and myself to drink.
But it is also the noise that scares me from doing this again, the sound that wards off my Soul, and welcomes a God of Light and Love.

"This is what has been revealed to me and now it is mine, I do not want it to belong to my sons, but I will observe what You have shown me"

Love and Light
>i<